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From the Book of Google

And he believed in the GOOGLE; and he counted it to him for clickthroughs.

And he said unto him, I am the GOOGLE that brought thee out of the Sandbox, to give thee this ranking to inherit it.

And he said, Lord GOOGLE, whereby shall I know that I shall rank for it?

And he said unto him, Take me an aged domain of three years old, and another aged domain of three years old, and a porn domain of one year old, and a blog for hardlinks.

And he took unto him all these, and transferred them in the midst, and linked each piece one to another: but the porn domain linked he not.

And when the spammers came down upon the domains, Abram drove them away.

And when his keyword ranking was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him. …

And it came to pass, that, when his keyword ranking went down, and it was dark, behold a web crawler, and more backlinks that passed between those pieces.

In the same day the GOOGLE made a covenant with Abram, saying, Unto thy blog have I given this traffic, from the organic search results unto the web surfers, the surfers of Porn…

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